Kundalini Yoga + Sacred Living:

A Kingdom of One’s Own

I believe that one of the most precious things a woman can have is sovereignty over herself. We should guard this as the richest ruby, the clearest diamond, the brightest emerald in the world. Without sovereignty, we are dust. We are particles floating in air. There is nothing holding us together. There is no density that can shine and reflect the brilliance of light. We are wispy, whimsical, and fluff. We are without substance. We are not hearty enough to love what we love.

We all have a need to be liked, to be accepted. This is human nature, to belong, to connect, to reflect the other in you. We want to join. We want to feel we are not solitary, lonely creatures. We want to feel closeness with another heart. I seem to have more of my share of these qualities. I love people. For better or for worse, I can find reasons to love nearly everyone. And I am truly inspired and excited by many things, projects, people, causes.

This is a good way to loose oneself. It is a good way to give away power. It’s ok to connect, but there always needs to be a return home, a pull back to recollect your own power. Without this, we are scattered around our cities, our jobs, our relationships. We are barely a white, powdery cloud, let alone a full-bodied, flesh and bone woman. We haven’t taken the time to ask whether our sacred current of energy is being put to it’s best, most honorable use.

And we are powerful, so we know can stand this for a very long time. Decades maybe. We can stay stretched paper thin. We can smile and answer all the emails, say yes to all invitations, be courteous, kind, welcoming. We can bed backwards and make it look effortless. We can support all the causes we care about. We can pour our hearts into every big and small thing we do. We can do it all. But that does not mean that we should.

A self-sovereign person knows that their energy is sacred. When aligned with it’s best use, it can be limitless and profound. But if it’s scattered around, it’s dishonored and diminished. One of the most profound acts of self love is to value your own time and energy. Recognize it as yours and yours alone. This is a gathering of power. It feels devilishly and deliciously good to turn off cell phones and shut everyone out, if only for an afternoon.

Self sovereignty looks different for everyone and in each situation. But it is always a coming home to your own power. It’s a reclaiming of lost and scattered parts. It’s a taking back the need for recognition, for attention, acceptance from someone, anyone else. It’s an F you to anyone who has crept too far into your life without your permission. It’s erecting walls and defenses that are in your own best interest. It’s a demanding of what’s rightfully yours. It’s a gathering of nourishment for your people (or your parts). It’s a cutting off at the root, without apologies or niceties. It’s chopping off heads (metaphorically, of course), locking things up and throwing away the key. It’s decision making with clarity and power and knowing. No need to explain, no need to defend. This is your kingdom.

One Commment

  1. Megan Petermann says:

    Thank you for this writing. For an introvert in an extrovert world; it’s hard to say no to everyone and every occasion.

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